Where or Who is a God Like You?

"Who is a God like you, pardoning iniquity, overlooking the sin of the few remaining for his inheritance? He doesn't hold on to his anger forever; he delights in faithful love. He will once again have compassion on us; he will tread down our iniquities. You will hurl all our sins into the depths of the sea. You will provide faithfulness to Jacob, faithful love to Abraham, as you swore to our ancestors a long time ago." -- Micah 7:18-20 (CEB)

If you were looking for a sign this is it.

via photopin (license)>

Who or Where is God?

Several years ago I learned a German worship song, based on these verses.  Here is the song, if you wanted to hear it:

Interestingly enough (at least for me), the version of the German verses state:  "Where is a God like you?" I haven't been able to ascertain why the translators of the German text (starting with Martin Luther himself) decided to translate it this way, but this translation was shocking for me. It knocked me down. As incorrect as it is in its translation, it was still a provocative question.

"Where is a God like you?"

I'd like to know where God is.

Sometimes I feel abandoned by God, lost, alone, and afraid. Not knowing where to turn to.

Where was God when George Floyd was murdered? Breonna Taylor? Ahmaud Arbery? Emmett Till? Malcolm X? Martin Luther King, Jr?

Where was God when I was assaulted for being bisexual?

Where was God when I went through a divorce?

The search behind the answers to these questions brings little comfort to me. No amount of Footprints in the Sand can assuage the pain I went through.

My Footsteps, Jebel al-Izaz ('The Crystal Mountain'), the White Desert, Egypt. via photopin (license)

Maybe That's Not the Point

Maybe I'm not supposed to know the answers to those questions. Maybe it's up to me to do my part through the pain. Pain happens all the time. Suffering and pain are so much a part of life. Buddhism itself is a response to that pain and suffering.

That certainly does not make it any easier at all. For some people, there is no answer to the question:  Where is God? It is simpler for them to say that God is not there. It is harder to say God is there, but God does not interact because God is not omnipotent or God does not care.

I remember, however, that I am not guiltless either. There have been countless times when I missed the mark. I have made so many mistakes in my life that I am really overwhelmed that I'm still around:  the mistakes I made as a parent, as a son, as a student, as an adult, as a missionary, and also as a pastor. I remember all of the things I used to believe, the choices I had made, the burden I became to others.

I feel ashamed. Maybe God does not act because I have not acted.

WHO is a God like you?

Despite my German Christian friends' Luther translation, the correct translation is "Who is a God like you?" It's almost like a play on words of the prophet's name:  Micah. Micah means "Who is like [God]?"

I've made tons of mistakes. More than I can count. More than I care to dwell on. Even through all those missteps, God was there for me in my life. Some people in traditional Christian circles call these errors "sins." They had a more forbidding aspect to them:  eternal damnation.

Thank God (literally), this is not the case. God does not hold our mistakes against us. He does not hold our sins against us. However, maybe in this instance it might be better to use the feminine pronoun, "she" for God. Verse 19 states that God will have "compassion" on us. The English translation of "compassion" means to "suffer with."

In Hebrew, however, this word has more to do with the love of a mother for her children and the root base of the word is actually "womb."

So God, in Her compassion, takes care of us and throws our mistakes deep into the sea. For the ancient Hebrews, the Sea was also an ancient deity (Yam), more dreadful than Poseidon, Neptune, or Ulmo (for Tolkien fans). It might also explain why the ancient Hebrews were never really a seafaring nation, despite being located on the Mediterranean. So our sins, our mistakes, the wrong we did in our life, has been cast into a place only those looking for fear and terror would venture. It's best to leave them there.

Have you messed up in life? Have you needed to start over? Have you stumbled and fallen and felt that life is over? God is compassionate. God doesn't count this against us. God does not condemn. God is love and will be there for us. We are not alone. We have each other and in that connection, God is there, too.

How to be an Ally

Before I Was Forced Out

I would love to say that I came out of my own free will, but I didn't. I was outed by a family member in a way that ruined my life, which is perhaps a story best saved for later.

Before that, though, I remember seeing the meme posted above. I felt I could definitely support this meme, even though it wasn't true for me. (It wasn't true because I am bisexual, and, by definition alone, would not qualify to be any ally.)

And then I was outed and my world came crashing down. It's a surreal feeling when that happens. You find out just exactly who is your friend.

Since Coming Out . . .

I have learned a lot about myself:  who I am, how I relate to people, and who will stand up for me.

There was the friend who offered his church to me as my home church, even though I was hundreds of miles away and could rarely attend there, if at all. There was my pastor, who didn't blink twice, when I told him that I'm bisexual and welcomed me into his church, baptizing me into a new walk of faith and offering me a spiritual home again. There was my gay friend, who listened to me as I bumbled through the new life of the LGBT world, trying to figure out where I fit into this world.

I still held out hope for my old denomination, The Salvation Army. Holding out hope that those progressive elements would still bring light into my old church. They would show the people of The Salvation Army that they were now marginalizing the very same people they had been called to serve. We even did a petition to our International Headquarters. Certainly they would listen.

They did not. There has been nothing but silence from the International Headquarters.

The Challenge

So I decided to issue a challenge to my fellow progressives. Surely they would rally behind and be more about action. We have talked enough. We have talked for over 6 years now about how we want change. It has yet to come.

To rephrase what I said (without the explanatory parlance of Salvation Army jingo):

I'm tired of allies being complacent about the state of affairs. Do you want to be an ally? Then stand up for us.

Pastors:  Conduct weddings for same-sex couples in your sanctuaries.

Lay people:  Attend a wedding of an LGBT couple.

Write your own pastor, superior, bishop, etc. about your views.

Give your testimony about how one can be gay and a Christian AT THE SAME TIME!

Do everything you can to show that this regulation preventing inclusion is wrong. More than that:  It is sinful. Stand up for us so that you will either be defrocked or shunned from the Church.

Anything else is just lukewarm.

Surely they would be willing to do that. Surely they have seen how we in the LGBT community have been shunned for so long. We have talked forever. Now is the time for action, not complacency.

The Reaction

It was not what I expected. Some questioned the legality of even performing a wedding for a same-sex couple. Apparently, even in countries where same-sex weddings are legal, if you perform the wedding in a denomination that forbids same-sex marriage, you could face a fine or imprisonment.

Pastors would at least lose their positions. For a Salvation Army officer, this means loss of pension, job, house, vehicle, etc. I am certain this is the same in other Evangelical churches.

Comments were turned off in the post with no further explanation, other than it was too heated of a discussion.

I felt utterly defeated. The people who said they would be my allies, when put to the test, stated they weren't willing to risk it at all.

It reminded me of the story in John 6:51-61, where people wanted to follow Jesus, but he told them that in order to do so, they must east his flesh and drink his blood. Jesus was speaking metaphorically, but it spooked his listeners, who didn't realize the sacrifice it would mean to follow Jesus.

You're a Fan, Not an Ally

What I discovered was this:  Straight people tend not to be allies of the LGBT community. They tend to mostly be fans. They support us, encourage us, but when it actually comes to taking a stand for us, they aren't willing to make the sacrifice. They aren't willing to lose their job, their reputation, or their place in the Church.

It is the irony of ironies that it seems as if the Progressive Church prefers the state of affairs it is in. Why does a gambler risk his/her money? It's not to win, it's because losing is so enjoyable. If he/she wins, that's an added bonus. The thrill of gambling comes in losing. Why does a battered wife stay with her abusive husband? It's because she doesn't know any different and the unknown is worse than what is known.

So it is with the Progressive Church. We clamor for change and justice, but we rarely take action to see it through. We prefer what we do know to what is unknown. We prefer to know where we are in this world and where we fit in the scheme of things. It is not universally this way and there are some wonderful noted exceptions, but the vast majority of so-called allies will not risk the change needed to bring justice.

If you want to call yourself an ally:  Be an ally. Support us. Defend us. Risk your livelihood. Being an ally means enjoying the accomplishments we have won, but it also means suffering what we suffer. Don't call yourself an ally if you don't actually mean it.

Be prepared to face what we have faced and are facing:  Ridicule and scorn.

Be prepared, also, to stand up for what is right:  Justice.

Take action. As the author said in his letter to the Corinthians:  "Look, now is the right time! Look, now is the day of salvation!" (2 Corinthians 6:2 CEB)

Eating at Chic-fil-a and Other Theological Quandaries

photo credit: JeepersMedia Chick-Fil-A via photopin (license)

Biased Opinion

The recent controversies surrounding the Salvation Army, Chic-fil-a, and Ellie Goulding have been discussed about with such great frequency that I doubt my own opinion would help. However, this whole topic has been bothering me, so much so that I have become once again embittered to what has happened in my recent past from being defrocked as a Salvation Army officer.

My opinion on this whole situation is therefore biased and biased to the extreme. I was once an officer in the Salvation Army, but after coming out as bisexual, going through a divorce, and having been a vocal advocate for LGBT inclusion in the Salvation Army, I was terminated with cause, with no chance to ever become an officer again.

That is the bias I bring to this conversation.

And I'm coming up with answers that I am uncomfortable with.

Chic-fil-a

Here's my first controversial statement:  I don't eat at Chic-fil-a regularly. I haven't seen the need and it doesn't necessarily appeal to me. I know I have now offended a wide swath of people. In all honesty, I don't particularly like to eat at fast food restaurants. The ones that I do frequent, if at all, I try to make certain to eat healthy. Chic-fil-a with its deep fried unhealthy chicken and waffle fries is not exactly the paragon of healthiness. In all honesty, neither have I been, but I digress.

Several years back, when it was revealed that Chic-fil-a's philanthropic support goes to some organizations that supported anti-LGBT views, they were roundly criticized. People stopped going there who were of a liberal persuasion. Conservatives loved it and made long queues outside of the stores in show of support.

Now with Chic-fil-a announcing they would no longer support certain agencies that have had a history of problematic relationships with the LGBT community (the Salvation Army and Fellowship of Christian Athletes), liberal people are flocking to the store and conservatives are aghast at what to do. I even had a good friend who, knowing my past history with the Salvation Army, asked me if it was OK for him to start eating at Chic-fil-a again.

Ellie Goulding

Ellie Goulding, a British pop star, had announced on Instagram that she was doing the halftime show of the Dallas Cowboy's annual Thanksgiving Game. This show traditionally is also the start of the Salvation Army's Red Kettle campaign. It is one of the Salvation Army's most important fundraisers during the winter phase, when they accumulate the most donations compared to the rest of the year.

Immediately there was an uproar among her fans due to the Salvation Army's troubled history dealing with the LGBT community. At first Goulding stated she wouldn't perform unless the Army offered an explanation or donated to an LGBT cause. That in and of itself would have been something:  The Salvation Army, a charity, donating to another charity.

All of the sudden, something behind the scenes happened and Goulding's concert is as of today still on and the Salvation Army issued a statement, thanking her for helping to dispel the rumors that the Salvation Army is anti-LGBT. Nowhere in that statement was there an apology from the Salvation Army to the LGBT community for when they have fallen short. Instead, where incidents of homophobia and discrimination involving the Salvation Army have come to light, the Army dismisses it as not representative of the Salvation Army. They have yet to apologize.

Is the Salvation Army anti-LGBT?

In a word:  Yes.

You might be wondering:  Why does the Salvation Army issue these statements about myths and non-discrimination?

The Salvation Army is trying to straddle a fence. On one hand, the Salvation Army is a Church. Most people are ignorant of this fact. They are also a part of Evangelical Tradition, coming out of the Holiness Movement. They just use military terms for traditional Church jargon.  "Officers" are pastors. "Soldiers" are members. "Corps" is a congregation. A "divisional commander" is a bishop. The General would be akin to the Pope.

The Salvation Army's social work is an integral part to their evangelistic work. Because often times the funding for their work comes from government sources, proselytizing is not allowed if the funding were to continue.

Nevertheless, the Salvation Army continues to serve humanity practically and it is due to their love of God that they serve all. The Salvation Army's own mission statement states that their mission is to "meet human need's in [Jesus Christ's] name without discrimination."

Then how is the Salvation Army anti-LGBT?

Their theology regulates people in LGBT relationships to be sinning.

In 2014, when marriage equality was slowly becoming law of the land in the United States, the Salvation Army was quick to respond to this "crisis." They issued instructions to all Salvation Army officers (pastors), forbidding them from performing same-sex weddings, attending these weddings in uniform, or allowing such weddings to take place in Salvation Army sanctuaries.

Officers who would go against such policies would end up being terminated.

Salvation Army officers (pastors) are not employees of the Salvation Army. When I became an officer, I had to sign a legal document, stating that I realized I wasn't an employee of the Salvation Army and that my relationship with the Salvation Army was spiritual, not legal. The Salvation Army in return gave me an allowance, a place to stay, etc.

That all went away when I was terminated.

It also gets around that pesky anti-discrimination clause. With officers not being employees, the Salvation Army could dictate to them who they could and could not marry. In this way, the Salvation Army could, in good conscious, say that they do not discriminate in their hiring practices.

What's the problem then?

Most people would just shake their heads and say, "Well, the Salvation Army is clearly very controlling, but they voluntarily signed up for that."

The Salvation Army's theological stance regarding marriage is that "The Salvation Army affirms that marriage is the voluntary and loving union for life of one man and one woman to the exclusion of all others." This forces LGBT people in the Salvation Army to either remain celibate, marry someone of the opposite sex (despite orientation), or leave. I remember last year at a music camp of the Salvation Army, a young man came out as gay. I stopped reading the comments on the feed when officers and soldiers criticized this young man for coming out.

Rejection is a bitter pill to swallow. When LGBT soldiers and officers (members and pastors) are forced to resign or are terminated, it leaves a gaping wound. It is perhaps easier for straight cisgender Salvationists to tell people in the LGBT community to find another church, not realizing that these people have long considered the Salvation Army their home. It is difficult to uproot and find another spiritual home. When that spiritual home rejects you, is it any wonder that so many people are simply rejecting religion altogether?

I never wanted to resign my commission (ordination) as a Salvation Army officer, but I was outed as bisexual and because I publicly questioned the Salvation Army's stance on LGBT inclusion, I was terminated with cause.

When that damning memorandum was leaked to the press, the Salvation Army tried to do damage control. They claimed their "theology of marriage" was separate from their "theology of service."

That's simply not true. Since their theology of marriage regulates LGBT people to celibacy, this mindset also informs their "theology of service." They should be one and the same.

But . . . 

Here's the thing:  The Salvation Army still serves people without discrimination. They help those in need and this includes those in the LGBT community. However, the Salvation Army will not accept people in the LGBT community as equals. Gay men cannot get married in the Salvation Army. Lesbian women cannot be ordained. A brief glance at most Facebook Salvation Army pages reveals the average Salvationist's stance towards the gay community:  from fear of the "gay agenda" or "lifestyle" to "prayerful concern" that the LGBT community will come to Christ.

Most Salvationists refuse to believe that people can be both gay, in committed relationships, and a Christian at the same time.

The Conclusion?

Will they serve people in the LGBT community practically?  Yes.

Is The Salvation Army anti-LGBT?  Yes.

Should we eat at Chic-fil-a? Should we put money in the red kettle?

That's perhaps not the right question. How do we treat our fellow human being? Do we show them love, or do we tell them they are not equal and cannot enjoy the same privileges that we do?

I guess it's a matter of conscience. I don't eat at Chic-fil-a. I'm not inclined to eat there now, either, even though they no longer support the Salvation Army. It's a marketing ploy to get us to spend money there.

I don't donate to the Salvation Army any more, even though they still help people out. I cannot forget how they treated me and how people in the Salvation Army continue to treat me after leaving.

It's a terrible thing to be shunned by the community that gave you a spiritual foundation.

I am also cognizant that this rhetoric of confronting the Salvation Army's homophobia comes up the most at Christmas time. It makes sense:  it's the Army's highest visibility. It's also the time when the Salvation Army raises the most money.

So what is the solution? Donate to the Salvation Army and people will be helped, including those in the LGBT community. Don't donate to the Salvation Army and maybe the Army will be forced to confront their homophobia.

The choice is yours. What's funny about it is that both choices have merit. It's a matter of your conscience.

Deconstructing Doctrine 11: Heaven and Hell

Christ our Judge via photopin (license)

This is the concluding blog post of my deconstruction of the Eleven Doctrines of The Salvation Army.

Rob Bell and Love Wins

In 2011, the pastor and speaker, Rob Bell, published his book, Love Wins, which dared to question our beliefs on Heaven and Hell. The backlash was immediate and fierce from the Evangelical Church. He was condemned as a heretic. He stepped away from his congregation, and people stopped coming to his events. The whole idea of even questioning whether or not there is a hell seemed too much for Evangelical Christians to accept. They disowned him.

Interestingly enough, he gained even more followers. He borrowed his son's microphone and began recording his thoughts in a podcast he called, The Robcast. I can't recommend this podcast enough.

I am cognizant that my own discussion of Heaven and Hell will lead to many people questioning who I am and whether or not I can still label myself a Christian.

This brings us to the final doctrine of The Salvation Army, #11:

We believe in the immortality of the soul; in the resurrection of the body; in the general judgment at the end of the world; in the eternal happiness of the righteous; and in the endless punishment of the wicked.

Squirrel Nut Zippers

In the 1990's, a jazz band from Georgia had a one-hit wonder with a calypso beat, called "Hell." I loved this song. It personified most of the preconceived notions we have of Hell.

It's irreverent, to say the least. I like it, even as I disagree with it.

So you're probably all wondering:  Do I believe in a literal Heaven and Hell? The question feels both important and at the same time irrelevant. Let me try to explain.

What did Jesus believe?

Jesus was a Jew. He wasn't a Christian. Nowhere in Hebrew Scriptures (Tanakh) is Hell EVER mentioned. Not once. For such an important concept in Christianity, one would think there should be some correlation in what Christians call the Old Testament. Judgment is mentioned in several places, but never a concept of Hell.

What is mentioned instead is an abode of the dead, called Sheol. English has a hard time translating this word. It is sometimes rendered as "the grave." Basically, it was an abode of the dead where everyone went, whether they were righteous or not.

Jesus' view on this is best exemplified in the parable of the Rich Man and Lazarus (Luke 16:19-31). In this view of the afterlife, the rich man who perished was in a punishment side of Sheol, but was also able to talk to Abraham, despite being separated by a huge crevasse. Most modern Christians reject this idea of an afterlife. People who are in Hell can't talk to people who are in Heaven, but here it seems that this is the case.

In other passages, where "hell" is used in English, the Greek equivalent is often Gehenna, which was an actual place outside of Jerusalem, used to burn refuse.

Now Jesus did preach about resurrection and judgment, but what does that all mean? These are questions that I am still exploring.

I believe in Hell

But it's probably not what you're thinking. I have seen Hell. More often than not, we humans are the best stewards of Hell. I saw Hell on the news when I saw a Hutu murder a Tutsi with a machete on a news footage on CNN. I saw Hell in the Churches of Rwanda, where the decomposed bodies, skulls and clothes were left to rot for a reminder for future generations.

I saw Hell in the eyes of released Kosovar Albanian men, who described how their sisters and daughters (who were Muslim) were raped by Christian men and had crosses sliced into their breasts.

I felt Hell in the tears of my children as they went through the pain of my divorce, not knowing exactly what was happening.

I experienced Hell when my corps officers (pastors) told me I was not welcome to be a member of their congregation.

I heard Hell as I listened to the desperate pleas on 911 of a boyfriend trying to take away the knives from his girlfriend, who had already slit her wrists and ankles.

More often than not, Hell is of our own making. We all suffer when we show or allow this cruelty to continue.

I believe in Heaven

But it's probably not what you're thinking.

I heard Heaven when my sons first told me that they love me.

I tasted Heaven when a poor Albanian family slaughtered a lamb and roasted it for me and my friend to welcome us to his home.

I experienced Heaven when I meditated and experienced the presence of God through centered prayer.

I felt Heaven when my pastor placed ashes on my forehead for Ash Wednesday.

I swam in Heaven when my pastor baptized me and welcomed me into the Church, with no thoughts about my orientation. I cried when the congregation applauded, validating that my journey had not been in vain.

I believe in the Realm of Heaven, which Jesus described to those he taught. The Realm of Heaven is like a parent, who welcomes back their long lost child (The Prodigal Son). The Realm of Heaven is like a heretic, who helps out the true believer, despite their differences in theology (The Good Samaritan). The Realm of Heaven is loving your neighbor, no matter who they are or what they have done.

The Realm of Heaven is therefore our responsibility to bring about here on Earth, not something for us to wait for when we die. By then it's too late.

What happens when I die?

I don't know for certain, but certainty is not part of my faith, or else it wouldn't be faith, just certainty.

Do I believe there is a place of Eternal Conscious Torment, a true Hell, which has been distorted by modern Christians by their perverted reading and understanding of Scripture? Absolutely not.

Am I going to a nebulous place in the clouds, guarded by a pearly gate and having streets of gold to walk on? I don't think so, either.

However, I do believe that God is in all and above all, a concept called panentheism. So when I die, I am still with God and God is with me. That gives me great comfort.

What if I'm wrong?

For my loved ones, this is probably the part that concerns them the most. I haven't given up on God. I still follow Jesus. I know the way I follow God is not like many people do and that's ok. Christianity is ever-evolving and changing. The way we worship is certainly not like Christians of the First Century worshipped. There's nothing wrong with that either.

Just because I don't believe in a fiery Hell doesn't mean I'm going to go there. I think that's the part that flusters most traditional Christians.

In the end, it doesn't matter and it's a waste of time worrying about it. Instead, our efforts should be concentrated on loving God by helping others, bringing about God's Realm on Earth.

The Eleventh Doctrine, reworded:

I believe that it's our responsibility to conquer the Hell we humans have made on Earth, by loving God and others, bringing about Heaven to Earth. God, who is with us, will never forsake us as we live and die.

Deconstructing Doctrine 10: Sanctifi-Holiness

The Happening via photopin (license)

This is the 10th blog in my series of deconstructing the doctrines of my former church, The Salvation Army. Please refer to the other posts if you haven't read those yet.

Sanctification vs. Holiness

A good friend of mine, who was a missionary to Germany before I was, once told me a story about giving a talk to a congregation about holiness. His German wasn't quite up to snuff yet, so he had a translator assist him. His opening remarks went thusly. (It's not an exact transcript, but you'll get the gist of it.)

"Today we will be talking about holiness." - Officer

"Heute reden wir über Heiligung." - Translator

"Or as it's sometimes also called, 'sanctification.'" - Officer

"Auf Englisch gibt es zwei Wörter für Heiligung." - Translator (If you don't speak German or have a German translation app, "In English there are two words for "holiness.")

English is a wonderful language, but it is really an amalgam of so many different language traditions. Sanctification and Holiness are basically the same term. "Sanctification" has it etymology in Latin and "holiness" is Germanic.

What is holiness? Given at its face value, and by what I was taught growing up in The Salvation Army, holiness is being set apart by God to be used for God's purpose.

Merriam-Webster has an interesting take on it:  "emphasizing the doctrine of the second blessing; specifically, of or relating to a perfectionist movement arising in U.S. Protestantism in the late 19th Century."

The Salvation Army comes out of the Holiness Movement. Along with Methodism, Nazarenes, and Wesleyans, these denominations emphasized the power of the Holy Spirit to transform lives, which brings us to the 10th Doctrine of The Salvation Army

We believe that it is the privilege of all believers to be wholly sanctified, and that their whole spirit and soul and body may be preserved blamless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

What's good about this Doctrine

What I appreciated most about this doctrine was the emphasis that ALL believers may be wholly sanctified. ALL may receive the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. ALL. Everyone. Whosoever.

From its inception, The Salvation Army has ordained women. That was a radical statement. Hardly any other denomination did. Even today, most prominent Evangelical preachers (John Piper, John MacArthur, etc.) view that having a vulva makes a woman incompatible with preaching.

The Salvation Army never did.

Granted, it took them forever to begin implementing this theology in all of its manifestations. For the longest time, married female officers were not allowed to hold a rank of their own. It was always in their husband's name. That changed in the 1980's. In the 2000's, women were finally allowed to have their own rank in their own name. It is slowly starting, but finally married women officers are being able to be placed in positions of leadership over their husbands.

Unfortunately, there has still never been a female married General of The Salvation Army. That hurdle probably won't be surpassed any time soon. It took the Army nearly 150 years to allow wives to be superior in rank to their husbands. It will probably take just as long for there to be a married female General.

What's not so good about this Doctrine

Do you recall the Merriam-Webster definition of holiness? An emphasis on perfectionism? Therein lies the headache of this doctrine.

I knew many officers who tried to say that holiness is not perfectionism. Yet this doctrine of holiness tends to drive up to that idea. Holiness was emphasized as leading a "sinless" life. This was the Salvationist's key to the pitfall of Arminianism. It is possible to lose your salvation, but if you have been sanctified by the Holy Spirit, the Spirit will help you to avoid sin in your life. This led to many calls for being set apart by God. The Salvation Army began to have two meetings on Sundays:  a Holiness Meeting and a Salvation Meeting. The former was geared towards soldiers. The latter was geared to non-members. (That for the most part has gone away. Now for the most part they only have one meeting on Sundays.)

Trying to live a holy life, as defined by what others say "holy" is, made me a nervous wreck as a child. I would pray every night to God to forgive me for doing all the sins I had done in my life. That prayer became my litany. I was scared that there was something I had done that would negate my salvation and send me to be damned for all eternity in the Flames of Hell.

Worse than that, this idea of holiness became a call for officership (ordained ministry). The hierarchy of The Salvation Army, with its soldiers, officers, etc., put an emphasis on being an officer. Then your whole life was dedicated to God and in God's service.

The Salvation Army has a two-tiered level of lay membership:  adherent and soldier. Although never stated overtly, adherents are second-class members, who can never be in a position of leadership.

Then there comes officers (clergy) and soldiers (laity). Being an officer often came with this implication that it was a higher calling than "merely" being a soldier.

The guilt trip of this was installed by none other than William Booth, the founder of The Salvation Army, who stated,

"Not called! did you say? 'Not heard the call,' I think you should say. Put your ear down to the Bible, hear Him bid you go and pull sinners out of the fire of sin. Put your ear down to the burdened, agonized heart of humanity, and listen to its pitiful wail for help. Go stand by the gates of hell, and hear the damned entreat you to go to their father's house and bid their brothers and sisters and servants and masters not to come there. Then look Christ in the face - whose mercy you have professed to obey - and tell Him whether you will join heart and soul and body and circumstances in the march to publish mercy to the world."

I understand that William Booth's drive and mission was to save as many people as he could. That passion ignited The Salvation Army and did much good in this world, but it came at a terrible price. Booth disowned 2 of his sons and would not allow them to be at their mother's deathbed because they left The Salvation Army.

God protect us all from such a calling.

What then?

My life with God is now so different. Perhaps it's the terminology that got in the way. I love the idea of being in communion with God. I love the idea of holiness, but I despise the baggage of perfectionism that comes with striving to be holy.

So instead of forcing myself to do all the right things, I turned to contemplation and meditation. The goal of holiness is communion with God. I have found that through meditation. It doesn't make me perfect, but it does make me whole and that is what matters to me. There are many helpful guides to meditation, especially on a Christian basis. Meditation is an ancient rite that many Christians are beginning to reclaim in their daily life. I have found it to be extremely empowering for me.

My own thoughts on meditation:  There is no wrong way to do it. Go easy on yourself, realizing that this is also a discipline we need to engage.  Sometimes we get distracted when we meditate. When that happens, just realize that this has happened, don't beat yourself up on it, and refocus on God.

It is through meditation with God that I have experienced what holiness means to me.

If you need a starter course, I would highly recommend this article from Gravity:  A Center for Contemplative Activism.

https://gravitycenter.com/practice/centering-prayer/

Reworking the Doctrine

If I were to rework this doctrine, I would say:

It is the privilege of all creation to seek out communion with God and with each other.

Deconstructing Doctrine 9: Calvin and Arminius

photo credit: Jairus Calvin and Hobbes via photopin (license)

I am continuing in my deconstruction of the 11 Doctrines of The Salvation Army. Please refer to the other ones for context. I apologize for the delay in the publication. I had my sons with me for the summer and that took priority for me.

Not Calvin and Hobbes

One of my favorite comics of all time is Calvin and Hobbes. The genius behind it is unparalleled. Bill Watterson, the artist behind the strip, named the two main characters after Jean Calvin a French theologian, and Thomas Hobbes, an English philosopher.

The Ninth Doctrine of The Salvation Army is basically a rebuttal to Calvinism and espouses the theology of Wesleyan-Arminianism. This doctrine states:

We believe that a continuance in a state of salvation depends upon continued obedient faith in Christ.

Definitions

Calvinism is based on the teachings of John (Jean) Calvin. To discuss this in this one blog would be to cover a vast amount of territory, one which I am not prepared yet to cover.

Arminianism is based on the writing of Jacobus Arminius, a Dutch theologian, who actually was trying to defend Calvinism and instead ended up opposing it. His ideas were expounded upon by John Wesley, the founder of Methodism.

If we were to limit it to the scope of this one particular doctrine, we would be dealing only with the doctrine of Salvation.

According to Calvinism, salvation is something bestowed upon by God and nothing one can do can separate you from that salvation:  Death, sin, love, etc. It is a gift of God that it given to certain elect (those whom God has chosen).

According to Wesleyan-Arminianism, of which The Salvation Army adheres to, salvation is something that one can choose to leave behind through sin, making mistakes, etc. Salvation is open to the "whosoever," while in Calvinism, it is only open to those whom God has chosen.

Guess what? You can find ample support in the Bible for both positions. People have actually had schisms in church simply over these teachings. That's ludicrous. There is no reason to do so.

What's at stake?

Salvation is at stake. For most Calvinists and Wesleyans:  where do I go when I die? Do I go to Heaven or Hell? Is my soul right with God or not?

I don't think this doctrine really matters.

Salvation and the Realm of God is something that Jesus proclaimed for people now, not when they died. Salvation is something we bring to our everyday life. We are saved in how we treat our fellow neighbor. We are saved when we do justice for the orphan and the widow. We are saved when we stand in solidarity with people of other beliefs. We are saved by showing the Love of God to everyone, no matter what they look like or who they are.

We humans tend to like to have things in black and white:  You are saved.  You are not saved.  You are going to Heaven.  You are going to Hell.  We act like Sentries of Gates that do not exist.

Who are we to make such a judgment? If we are showing love to everyone and treating everyone with love and kindness, no matter who they are, we are saved. We have also brought salvation to the people we are loving. I believe that this is something God wants all of us to do, but many of us choose not to do it.

Conclusion

If I were to rewrite this doctrine, I would simply erase it.

Deconstructing Doctrine 8: Justification

Sword of Justice / La Justice via photopin (license)

Apologetics

In 1519, a young monarch was furious with the German theologian, Martin Luther. He specifically felt it was his duty as a head of state to stand up to what he believed were the heresies of Luther's 95 Theses. He wrote a treatise in rebuttal of this work, entitled Assertio Septem Sacramentorum, or "Defense of the Seven Sacraments." To reward him for his diligence in defending the Holy Roman Catholic Church, the Pope awarded him with the title, "Defender of the Faith," a title which all subsequent successors to his throne enjoy to this day.

The monarch was King Henry VIII of Great Britain, who himself would break away from the Catholic Church and start the Church of England, with himself as the head, in order to marry whom he wanted to marry.

Apologetics is this discipline that King Henry was exercising. Apologetics is the "branch of theology devoted to the defense of the divine origin and authority of Christianity." In my opinion, it is one of the lowest forms of theology because I do not believe God nor Christianity need any defending.

Which brings us to the Eighth Doctrine of the Salvation Army:

We believe that we are justified by grace through faith in our Lord Jesus Christ and that he that believeth hath the witness in himself.

Surprise!

I have virtually no issues with this doctrine.

My chief complaint would be the archaic language and the use of the King James Version.

This is perhaps my favorite doctrine. Basically, for me it seems that I do not have to defend myself as a Christian. I am "justified." In this sense, justification means being made righteous by God.

What's even better, this justification is found within us. This doctrine uses the King James translation of 1 John 5:10, which states in the Common English Bible:  "The one who believe's in God's Son has the testimony within."

Unfortunately, many people tend to make themselves God's Gatekeepers and "Defenders of the Faith," as if God needed to defend herself.

No True Scotsman . . .

There is an old adage that begins, "No true Scotsman puts sugar on his porridge." It is used to justify many things. People tend to misquote Scripture and say that they are simply "discerning the fruits." They aren't trying to do that. They are more concerned with whether or not you belong to their tribe. So they use this false logic:

No true Christian would pray to Mary.

No true Christian would work on Sunday.

No true Christian would have an abortion.

No true Christian would support a "gay lifestyle" (whatever that means!).

Yet this wonderful doctrine states that I do not have to prove to you that I am a Christian. Many people try to figure out if someone is a Christian. They will try to use discerning questions, such as:  "If you were to die tonight, do you know that you would go to Heaven?" They will try to use a litmus test on you to discern whether or not you are a "member of their tribe."

"Are you saved?"

"What Church do you go to?"

"If you were to stand before God tonight and he asked you why he should let you into heaven, what would you tell him?"

This last question assumes the wrong things. First of all, it assumes that our lives as Christians is to make it into Heaven. Heaven is never my goal. When Jesus was ministering on Earth, he proclaimed the Kingdom of Heaven here and now. He did not say, "do this and you will get into Heaven." The Kingdom of Heaven was a matter of serving the poor, feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, and welcoming the stranger. The Kingdom of Heaven is a matter of loving God by showing that love to others.

There is an old song by Andrae Crouch. It states:

But if Heaven never was promised to me

Neither God's promise to live eternally

It's been worth just having the Lord in my life.

Living in a world of darkness

You came and brought me the life.

What now?

I want to live my life as if there is no Heaven and it's my responsibility to build it here on this planet. It is my duty to live in such a way that God's love is brought to everyone. I want to live in such a way that it is my duty to bring love and life into this world and to make Heaven a Place on Earth. (There you go, Belinda Carlisle fans.)

If I were to rework this Doctrine, I would say:

I believe my identity is found in God and I do not need to prove this to anyone. My life is my witness.